Let’s Get Married (Part I)

Yep I’ll admit it, the title is very much a clickbait *insert monkey hiding eyes emoji here*. As spontaneous as I am, I won’t be proposing via blog form unless I expect to get rejected in my comments section. I have however had a few conversations about weddings, specifically on wedding rings and believe me when I say I was hearing prices upwards of about 50k. The day my wife is wearing a mortgage deposit on her finger is the day I know I’ve made it. With one flick of the wrist she could feed the five thousand. Of course, I’d love to get married some day in the future though. If I have any hopes of my kids becoming professional athletes and allowing me to retire at 45, I’m sure a family environment would be the best way to nurture this. From what I’ve seen though, people don’t seem to share the whole ‘getting married’ idea. Marriage rates are falling and divorce rates are skyrocketing; as someone embarking to that stage of my life in the next few years, it’s something of a concern.

Lemme speak from a guy’s view point, what’s the incentive? I’m sure some of our fathers and forefathers can testify that marriage opened up a whole new window of benefits that wouldn’t have been available otherwise. But we live in a very different world from back then. Nowadays I see guys with boot cut jeans, iPhone 4s and sh*t trims updating their CVs with the finest women of all different shapes and sizes. Not only being fulfilled sexually but they’re being cooked for and in some cases financially supported. That’s the triple threat, on a WWE vibe! The benefits of marriage without making it legally binding so they don’t forfeit half of their possessions if they decide to change tariffs… well that’s what the narrative is anyways. Some dudes don’t wanna get married to protect themselves from losing assets they don’t even own to women they have no chance of obtaining lol. These guys barely have a phone contract, so they definitely have no vision of signing that marriage one.

Things aren’t any better from a women’s point of view too – speaking objectively of course. Gone are the days where a woman will need to rely on a man for building a future. Financially, women will kick your a** nowadays. They worried about you taking half of their possessions during a divorce settlement! That independent women vibe with an ambiance to match. Do you know how good it feels to go out for a meal with a lady and she takes care of the bill? I don’t neither but I’ve heard it’s amazing. With all this success comes a compromise though. You’ve got women focusing more on their careers with less emphasis on marriage and building a family. And a lot of guys are intimidated by these types of women too. You can’t claim to be wear the pants in the relationship if your partner buys them for you I suppose.

Gone are the days where a woman will need to rely on a man for building a future. Financially, women will kick your a** nowadays.

“But Joe, that’s a very sad take you’ve portrayed of marriage”. Unfortunately, successful marriages don’t make for successful blogs. Although I did go uni with this one guy; I swear he cheated on his girlfriend for sport. Not too sure when exactly his partner noticed that ‘Dominoes’ kept sending him one too many nudes mind you. When she eventually found out, she called his work urgently demanding him to come home just so she called hit him with a haymaker packed with so much force that it defined Isaac Newton’s Law of Motion. Dunnoe what shocked me more, the fact that he claimed me and my other boy influenced his cheating or the fact that she believed him. Regardless they’re happily married now so I guess marriage doesn’t have to be perfect… just find someone equally as imperfect as yourself and you’ll find a way!

Part 2: https://joeoriade.com/2018/03/17/lets-get-married-part-ii/

Joe